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| just keeping this temp alive.
be back later....maybe.
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| Crunch Time
It's funny/sad becuase I always write in this thing when I shouldn't. Wednesday, I have a big exam that I need to be preparing for and a dammed science journal write up paper. Why I always take these important moments in my life to write in this thing, I don't know. What I do know is that I almost always come out OK, but with mad stress.
My apartment alway has a kind of faint, funky stench to it. My roomate and I have gotten a lot of air refreshners including an air wick spray, and febreeze galore. I think it's the indian couple a floor beneath us that are the cuase of this. They cook. Oh yes, they cook. They cook with curry.
Around this time exams are creeping their dirty, slutty heads around the corner and like always, I know that they're coming but I have to wait at the corner and wait for the exam to turn the corner and make me piss my pants. Maybe a bit too graphic of an analogy there, but once again, this is my site, and I write what pours out of my head.
RJD2 - "Exotic Talk"
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| Summah tyme
I've said this a lot, but what I have with my local CVS in Newton is
like an abusive relationship. The store takes advantage of me, tricks
me, and just beats me up. Every time it happens, I swear never to come
back ever again, but I always do. It would be sad except for the fact
that I'm finally working in the pharmacy now and learning about stuff
that's going to be usefull for medical school. Over the month I've
become accustomed again to the rich, snoby, old Bostonian ladies that
make up a big part of the stores customers. If they yell at me because
they didn't save 75 cents on their adult diapers, I don't get pissed at
them for taking out the computers mistake on me - instead, I simply
give them my manager's card and tell them to knock themselves out,
followed by "next please!".
Work has been taking up virtually all of my time, minus the two
weekends that I've gone down to New Jersey this past month. The summer
is going to pick up a bit more soon when I'm a facilitator for badasht
in two weeks followed by a few fun trips to different parts of the
country. Thats the update. Peace.
Little Brother - "Home Ft. Joe Scudda"
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| It's ----day already???
Spring is finally here. Three weeks to go and I start the summer, which
I'm still not absolutely sure what I'm doing with. It's funny because I
feel like it was only a few months ago when I flew out to Arizona and
then to Costa Rica for the summer and lived in the jungle for a couple
of months. Man, this year went by so damn fast. I need to figure my
life out. I feel like time is going by and I'm having trouble keeping
track of where it is. It's like I turn around and it's next week, and
now it's the end of the semester. I graduate in a year and I don't know
what's going to be happening with my life when I do....partly dependent
on how I do academically until then. I'm going to be in my early 20s.
It sounds like I got a while, but with time moving so fast now, I can
only imagine how quickly the year after graduation is going to come. I
know when that time comes, I'll look back. I'll look back to where I am
right now and wonder if my college life could have been better. Of
course it could have been. Then why didn't I do anything? I'm asking
myself that right now. The easy answer is that schoolwork is taking up
all my time. I know there's more to it than that. Some things that
haven't breached the surface yet.
There is something else that is coming close to breaching the surface.
I feel like there are two parts of me. There always has been. The part
that I subdued a few years ago has been coming back in the last few
months and even more so in the last couple weeks. What I don't know is
if I've just been noticing it more, or if it really is increasing. When
I see it coming out in me, I shut-up. I can't say anything because I'm
afraid the other part of me will be let out for other people to see.
It's ugly. It's not me. But it is. I want to say it's what I used to
be, but here I am trying to figure out what is wrong and why I can't
get rid of this other side. I'm going through a lot of shit right now
so maybe it'll go away soon. I'm burning out. I need to get away.
Mos Def - "Hip-Hop" | | |
| I love these two so much
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